You know the moment I’m talking about. The moment when every frustration and worry, along with a dose of anger just spews out. The moment you can’t hold back, and one little thing makes you spew words and appear like a crazy lady. You spew and then you think – oh my goodness, where did that come from and who was that person? My husband can attest I’ve had my fair share, and if we’re honest and can admit it, we’ve all had one! I call it the monster moment.
Sometimes life looks you in the face and gives you #perspective (which by the way is my 2014 word!). Tonight, as I was folding laundry and trying to shuffle kids out the door to church, one of the littles erupted in to a full fledge monster moment. (growl included) I looked at him and my heart broke. As much as I wanted to be angry, I melted because I have been there so many times, and I get it. I really do.
So, two of the three littles were off in the car and church activities. And I came home to the other one. One who was sure that he was IN BIG TROUBLE. I had him grab his bible and we headed off to the local house of prayer. (A place open everyday with Jesus music and people praying.)
On the way, I got honest. I told him that even mommies have moments like that. Moments when nothing seems right and we just puke out a bunch of emotions. Moments when we just can’t hold it in anymore. And then we processed some ways we could both handle things differently. I shared with him that Jesus is often my peace and what keeps me from my monster moments.
And we sat in a small room and I prayed over him. I asked God to speak to him, and to lead him in his bible to just where he needed to go. we prayed that God would provide the peace that even a loving mama couldn’t sometimes. When life is overwhelming, sometimes the only thing that will help is Jesus. (most often this is the case!)
As we sat in that room, he read his bible and engaged in real ways. But truth is, his mama learned far more from this learning lesson than he did. Sometimes, it’s easy to preach and not practice what we preach. Tonight, as I shared my heart with this little, tears streamed down my face. Because I realized this lesson, and it’s timing, well, they were as much for me as anything.
As I lay down my #loveidol, my #perfectfamily, I’m letting go of hiding the real things. The ugly things. The monster moments that may look a bit like a demon fleeing from you. And sometimes, that means getting real with your littles, and sometimes it means getting real with yourself.
On the grief journey, I haven’t looked to Jesus for peace like I should. His word, well, it has seemed distant. I’ve struggled with my daily reading.
And my monster moment, well, it hasn’t surfaced, but I could feel it welling up. Tonight, I again lay down my #loveidol. My kids aren’t perfect, and neither am I, but I am #preapproved. We have ugly monster moments. And sometimes it takes a monster moment to spew out for us to realize we need to give God some space to touch us.
Please tell me you all have monster moments too:-)
To learn more about #loveidol and how you can be #preapproved,
Find out more here: http://amzn.to/NRlxsv